


Perspectives

by ATLPanther



Category: Killing Eve (TV 2018)
Genre: Alternate Ending, Alternate Universe, Coming Out, F/F, Fluff and Angst, Fluff and Smut, Masturbation, Villanelle
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-05
Updated: 2019-04-05
Packaged: 2020-01-05 05:52:47
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,964
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18359936
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ATLPanther/pseuds/ATLPanther
Summary: The saying goes that in every story there’s your side, my side, and the truth. Both Eve and Villanelle reflect on the events in Villanelle’s Paris apartment. What really happened that day? What could have happened that day?





	Perspectives

Eve had said to her that day, “I think about you all the time. I think about what you’re wearing, and what you’re doing, and who you’re doing it with. I think about what friends you have. I think about what you eat before work and what shampoo you use and what happened in your family. I think about your eyes and your mouth and what you feel when you kill someone. I think about what you had for breakfast. I just want to know everything.” 

“I think about you, too”, Villanelle had replied. “I masturbate about you a lot.” 

Eve’s facial expression changed multiple times in quick succession. At first she had that determined expression that Villanelle always found irresistible. Then she seemed to register shock at her confession and, and finally her face crumbled as Eve collapsed on the bed. Villanelle was fairly confident that there would be no shootouts that day. Eventually they were face to face on the bed, and it was nice to be close to Eve like this. 

Oh, she had undressed Eve before on the night they’d had dinner at the home she shared with her husband. She had surreptitiously observed her now for weeks, yet this was the first time Eve had seemed so relaxed, almost drained. In that moment she seemed almost malleable. 

Eve broke the silence. “I’ve never done anything like this before.” Villanelle could see in her eyes that this was true, and she detected a hint of shyness in her voice. 

“I know what I’m doing”, Villanelle had replied moving on top of her, but then there was the unfortunate incident with the knife. She was prepared for penetration, but not that kind. There was a brief struggle, and Villanelle managed to grab the gun she had placed under the bed and fire off a couple shots in Eve’s direction, but eventually Eve fled leaving her in a bloody heap. Madame Tatterin heard the commotion from next door and rushed Villanelle to the hospital where she was patched up and given antibiotics. The ordeal lasted a month. 

The whole situation had been a shame, really. Strangely she didn’t entirely blame Eve for what she had done. She characterized it as the knife just happening to cut her, as opposed to a deliberate act on Eve’s part. She would have forgiven Eve anything, even her very nearly being mortally wounded by her. Her feelings towards her hadn’t changed, even in light of these recent events. 

Villanelle returned to her still wrecked apartment to recover and also to plan her next steps. She knew that someone from The Twelve would be getting into contact with her at some point, but for right now her time was her own. She took one look around her apartment and decided that she would set things back to rights later. 

As though on a mission she headed directly for the bedroom, took off her clothes, and dove face down onto her bed. She had to know if the sheets still carried any trace of Eve’s scent, if there were any stray strands of her gorgeous hair, if there was any evidence that she had been there at all. The outline of where her body had been was gone, but when she closed her eyes she did catch a small whiff of Eve’s perfume. She smiled. 

It was really unfortunate that Eve was no longer there. After all those weeks of watching her and chasing and being chased by her, she had been prepared to have some real fun with her that day. Up until the knife was involved, Eve definitely seemed like she would be a willing participant. She allowed her mind to wander over what might have been. 

“I should have held her wrists down on the bed when I got on top of her”, she mused. In her mind’s eye she saw Eve’s beautiful eyes looking back into hers. Just like on that day, she was in her frumpy sweater and turtleneck which Villanelle found endearing, and her hair was down. That’s how Villanelle liked it best. 

She pictured herself straddling Eve, pinning down her wrists above her head and looking down into her eyes. She imagined herself leaning down to kiss her lips. At this thought her breath caught in her throat. She had been so tantalizingly close to those lips only to have ultimately been denied the pleasure of knowing how they felt and tasted. 

“Life can be cruel”, she mused with a smirk before allowing herself to continue the fantasy. Eve was returning her kiss, hesitant at first, but with more gusto as she released her inhibitions and let herself be taken in by Villanelle’s persistent kisses. As they continued to kiss she felt Eve’s body relaxing so she released her wrists and felt Eve wrapping her arms around her, pulling her into an even deeper kiss. 

Eve began moaning into Villanelle’s kiss, which further emboldened Villanelle to place her hands on Eve’s hips. Seeing no objection to this, she slipped her hands under Eve’s shirt, allowing her fingertips to lightly meander up and down her hips. 

“Her skin is probably really soft”, Villanelle decided to herself. She allowed that image to fade from her mind’s eye and then turned onto her back, laying her head on the pillow that Eve had used. She closed her eyes and inhaled deeply to take in another whiff of Eve’s scent before bringing her hands to her breasts. Villanelle now imagined it was Eve who was touching her nipples. 

“Would she be rough, or gentle?”, Villanelle pondered. She couldn’t decide if Eve would approach her breasts with the same single-minded determination she approached the hunt to stop her, or if she would be shy and unsure of how to proceed. She also couldn’t decide which approach she would prefer Eve take. 

It had been a few weeks since she’d had any sexual release at all, considering she was in the hospital, so she had a backlog of sexual tension to work out. Ultimately she chose to go with the idea of a bolder Eve because, honestly, she was horny. This bold imaginary Eve was stroking her nipples, gently twisting them in her fingertips. Villanelle began to pleasurably sigh and let her mind wander further. 

As she continued to play with her tits, she imagined it was Eve tweaking her nipples while kissing her neck. Eve was a little rough, which Villanelle really liked. She began to moan a bit louder. Eve then began kissing her way down her neck and to her breasts. She started suckling her left breast, and then her right. The nipple that was not being sucked was being roughly twisted in her fingertips. Vilanelle’s moans continued. 

After a while of this, Eve began to move her lips lower down Vilanelle’s body. She left her breasts to slowly kiss her stomach and then worked her way down until she was between Vilanelle’s legs. When Eve’s imaginary tongue began massaging Villanelle’s clit, Villanelle placed her fingers there. She imagined running her fingers through Eve’s hair as she began to suck her clit in earnest. 

Villanelle wanted to cum quickly, but she had waited so long for this moment that she tried to hold back her orgasm. Eve’s tongue was driving her crazy as she licked her clit, and then moved it slightly lower to pump it in and out of her pussy. Villanelle began to grind against Eve’s face, gripping her hair tightly, moaning even louder. 

When Eve eventually sucked her clit into her mouth again, she orgasmed into Eve’s mouth. She pictured Eve placing her hands around her thighs and continuing the oral assault on her clit. Eve’s tongue, which had used measured strokes before, now was almost frantic. It swirled all around her clit, probing her pussy again. She felt Eve’s lips exploring her and it felt so real that Villanelle came again and again. 

Finally satiated, she lay back on her bed and looked up at the ceiling. The images of Eve completely dissipated. It was just her, in her bed, with her fingers covered in cum. She knew Eve was still out there, and she knew she would find a way to get into contact with her again. As long as The Twelve still needed her to kill these people, Eve would be lurking not far behind her trail. 

In the meanwhile, she was tired from her exertions. Before falling asleep she wondered, “Would Eve want cuddles after sex?” 

With this thought she smirked again and fell asleep on the pillow Eve had used. The scent of her there carried her off to a dreamless sleep. 

************************************************************************************************

Eve curled herself into a ball under a blanket on Elena’s couch. Since her sojourn in Paris, she had basically held herself up at Elena’s place. Thankfully the divorce with Nico had actually been pretty amicable. She’d acted boorish towards the end of their marriage, to say the least, but it was really for the best. He deserved to have a wife who wouldn’t go off on adventures involving chasing serial killers, and she...well...she wasn’t exactly sure what she deserved or even what she wanted. 

They sold their place and split the money down the middle. She knew that she would eventually need to find her own place and a new job, but she was aimless. Elena had managed to get back on with MI5, but she wasn’t entirely sure if she would be welcome there considering what had happened between her initial firing. Frank’s death would have also presumably permanently ended her employment there. 

She sighed and closed her eyes before running her fingers through her hair. Every time she closed her eyes she saw Vilanelle’s face. She didn’t see it the way it had looked when Villanelle was shooting at her, or when she was screaming in pain and Eve had been trying to find something to staunch the bleeding, but what she saw was the way her face had looked just before all of that. 

There had been a gentleness in Villanelle’s face right then. If she had been amenable Eve got the sense that Villanelle would have certainly made sure she had a great time that afternoon. Villanelle had been prepared to take the lead and make her first sexual encounter with a woman feel safe. It was so bizarre to think of safety with regard to an interaction with a known serial killer, but this was Eve’s life now. 

For all the time Eve had spent trying to push away thoughts of Villanelle, she had been determined to come back into her focus. Every day she found herself scanning the news for any hint of Villanelle being back to her wonted ways. It surprised her every time she was dismayed to see that no prominent businessmen or weapons dealers or politicians had been killed by a mysterious assassin. She wondered if maybe she had critically injured or even killed Villanelle. 

Internally she was in a constant mental war. On the one hand, getting Villanelle off the streets and into protective custody was best for society. She was a remorseless killer who probably would never stop until she had been captured or killed. Still, there was a side of Villanelle that she found...compelling? Attractive? ...Desirable? And she didn’t want to imagine a world without Villanelle in it, as though the world would lose some of its spark. That this spark came with a side of murder was just mere happenstance. 

It was a paralyzing way to live, and so she retreated further into Elena’s couch and did nothing. Thanks to the money from the divorce she was able to pay her part of the rent and groceries, so Elena was fine enough with having her there. Eve also guessed that Elena was not-so-secretly worried about her and what she would do left to her own devices in this mental state. She wasn’t exactly subtle about her continuing search for clues of Villanelle’s whereabouts and condition. For her part, Eve was grateful for Elena’s generosity. 

She closed her eyes and allowed herself to envision Villanelle again, as she had been that day in Paris. She had slumped onto Villanelle’s bed. She couldn’t exactly explain why she had done that. 

“Well, I was tired”, she mentally answered herself. Still, inside, she knew that wasn’t the entire reason. She could have laid down anywhere else in that apartment, but she had chosen that spot. 

“Beds are comfortable?”, she weakly rejoined, but then followed up with “No, that’s bullshit. If I’m gonna get myself out of this mess, I gotta start being honest with myself.” With that, she got off the couch for the first time that day and headed into the bathroom to look at herself in the mirror. 

Physically, she looked the same, but inside she knew something that changed. That moment in Paris when they had been about to kiss changed the entire trajectory of her feelings towards Villanelle. As she stared into her own eyes in the mirror she made a realization. This was no longer about merely bringing Villanelle to justice. She would have welcomed that kiss. If Villanelle had been there right now, she would have kissed her. 

“Fuck”, she murmured aloud before splashing some water on her face, drying herself off, and returning to the couch. The truth was just overwhelming. 

“At first I was just trying to connect the pattern of these killings”, she thought to herself. “Then I saw her and...met her. And then that day in her bed…” She wanted to block out the memories, but she couldn’t. 

She saw herself in Villanelle’s apartment saying “I think about you all the time. I think about what you’re wearing, and what you’re doing, and who you’re doing it with. I think about what friends you have. I think about what you eat before work and what shampoo you use and what happened in your family. I think about your eyes and your mouth and what you feel when you kill someone. I think about what you had for breakfast. I just want to know everything.” 

“I think about you, too”, Villanelle had replied. “I masturbate about you a lot.” 

Eve wasn’t completely surprised to hear that. She’d read in her forensic psychology books that hypersexuality could be a part of the profile for a psychopath. There had been many nights where thoughts of Villanelle had kept her awake, and not all of those thoughts related to her crimes. The objectively correct thing to do in a situation like that was not to collapse on the bed with a psychopath who had a sexual obsession with you, but that is exactly what she had done. 

Eve saw Villanelle next to her again, and then slightly on top of her. Her lips had been tantalizingly close to hers, but in a split second she had plunged the knife into Villanelle’s abdomen and thus what could have been a sexual encounter ended. Eve instantly regretted what she’d done. That’s why she ran off to find something to staunch the bleeding, but it was too late. Villanelle fired off a few shots at her, and she had fled. 

“I hope it’s not too late for a do over”, she ruefully smiled to herself. As strange as this was, she knew she would give anything for another opportunity. She didn’t want that to be the last encounter she ever had with Villanelle. 

“How would I want it to be different next time...assuming there is a next time?”, she asked herself. She closed her eyes and allowed herself to recreate the moment in which they had been about to kiss. She had replayed this moment over and over again in her mind, but she always stopped herself from imagining what could have happened. This time would be different. 

She saw herself again in Villanelle’s bed. This time she allowed herself to picture that first kiss. The thought was so exhilarating to her that she inhaled sharply and had to open her eyes and shake her head a bit. 

“Was this was I was afraid of? Afraid I’d like it? Afraid I’d want more?”, she asked herself. Truth be told, she did like this idea. She did want more. She wanted to feel Villanelle’s lips on hers. She wanted to touch her. She wanted to be touched by her. She was afraid of this realization. 

“Bill tried to talk to me about this. Oh, shit! I’m...not straight”, she said aloud. “I’m…gay? No, I do still like guys I think. Does this mean I’m...bisexual?”

As soon as she said the words she knew that it was true. It all fell into place and some of her feelings towards Villanelle made a lot of sense. Villanelle was attractive...beautiful, even. Eve’s head swam at this reality check. 

Eve closed her eyes again and let the thoughts of Villanelle wash over her. She wanted to kiss and touch her, and in her mind’s eye she did just that. She kissed her lips, her neck, she imagined nibbling her earlobes. Before she realized it, her hands were down her pants. In her mind it was Villanelle’s hands touching her. 

She felt Villanelle’s fingertips on her clit. She imagined kissing Villanelle as she enjoyed her ministrations. It didn’t take long for her to cum, and the orgasm was so intense that she lay there on the couch as though she were in a daze. When the afterglow ended she took stock of her feelings. 

She had to find Villanelle again. She had to see her again. The last time she saw her absolutely could not be the last time.

**Author's Note:**

> First attempt at a Villaneve fic. Will be adding to this, so that’s why it’s tagged as alternate universe as I suspect the show will go in a much different direction than I envision.


End file.
